Ok, so first of all I am totally aware that we are only on day three of the first week of term but already I feel something has changed for me. I noticed it shifting over the Christmas holidays and am delighted the “shift” continues into 2021. For once I feel acceptance. Not gratitude, not resentment, just an acceptance of my life how it is...
Usually for Christmas and New Year I like to focus on things being as close to perfect as I can muster. Eyebrows looking good, hair done, well thought through Christmas outfit, legs waxed, indulgent shower gel and body lotion. You know, as nice as things can get. This year I had my new outfit but I didn’t sweat the small stuff. I preferred to focus on the fact I was actually with my family, that was more than I could have wished for. Again, for NYE we were far from perfect. We’d just arrived from Spain and the girls stayed in their travelling clothes and whilst I changed my focus was on comfort rather than the usual, obligatory NYE glamour. And I felt fine about greeting 2021 as I was without it being representative of the year ahead. And guess what? If I was washing, tidying, unpacking and cleaning on the 1st January that is probably because it is representative of the year ahead! AND I AM OK WITH THAT!
This week, back in MC and the girls back at school means more of the cleaning, tidying, unpacking but this time I haven’t stressed. I’ve sat down to do the things important to me first and not waited for that “perfect” moment of quiet tranquility, calm and tidy home that always eludes me. I’ve prayed, meditated, practiced piano, PEAK trained, read and written in the midst of my messy reality and strangely felt more productive than usual! Hey, I’m even writing this with the ironing board still out! Who cares?
On top of that I’ve been switching of my phone from 20h00 to 08h00 so my evenings are not mindless browsing and it has been so liberating. No temptation to check messages, shops, news or anything just because my brain sit still for five minutes. I highly recommend!
Anyway... that’s enough from me. I’m off to pick up the girls (after I’ve put the ironing board away!).
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